I've had only one "serious" relationship.
I play on a co-ed soccer team ( Christian league; we can do that--lol), and there was this girl on the team I had met like two years ago.
For the first.....two months I didn't even take notice of her. She appeared to be "emo", so I just assumed she was, and not think much of it.
After a game, we ate at Mcdonalds, and I decided to sit directly across from her. We talked, discussed favorite things--you know, the usual crap.
We STRANGELY had ALOT in common, so naturally I became interested.
We shared instant messenger names, and literally talked until 3 AM.
For the next few weeks we would talk to each other for hours on end, really figuring each other out.
Eventually, after discussing whether I like another woman alot( I told her only as a friend), she asked me " How long should we wait?" I got excited because I had grown to truly love her, but had been holding back the entire time. I then said I wasn't sure what she was talking about ( she had said something before that had us not on the same page), then she said " dating!!" I then said a while, and we began to discuss how things would be. She said she kind of wanted a romantic relationship, whereas I had been trying to convince her that viewing each other as a team would be a better concept for us to hold while dating.
Eventually we hung out more and more, and were very serious, at least compared to the relationships of others our age. The only problem was that we decided that I should first ask her dad for permission to date her, but hadn't gotten to it, which annoyed her.
Eventually, after things between us seemed to get really boring, as my awkwardness and absurdity is only unpredictable until a certain point, and she ended up e-mailing me saying she doesn't want to date me--or at least not yet. I was a little upset, but a friendship was a better idea at the time, considering after we admitted our affection for each other, things went down hill, because of her romanticism.
She said she didn't want to date until college, because she has too much going on. I completely agreed with and respected that decision.
However, when I asked her whether she would date other people during this time, she said she didn't know. I told her that it would hurt badly.
She then responded " Why, if we're just friends?" After that comment, we did not speak much for four months, because she began to ignore me, which obviously didn't sit well with me.
Two months later(now), she actually acts normal around me, though talks very little to me.
It is really upsetting to think about the fact that I had super-woman( she is incredible, I sware) almost within my grasp, but somehow managed to lose her. I've only just recently started to look for other women, but have been disapointed with each prospect for whatever the reason may be.
Some aren't as smart as I thought they were, some don't care about staying in shape when they're older, and some aren't in good shape now.
I'm not sure I still like the original woman still, as I wouldn't be too hurt if she were to see another man, but....strangely I'm hesitant to welcome in another woman.
After dealing with a relationship with the person most like me, and being hurt in the end, I have decided to avoid relationships, unless they were attractive women who were smart.
Emotionally, I am too weak to deal with a let down as great as the one mentioned again.
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