Oh wow i'm so sorry

My dad died when i was 3. I saw pictures of it. Probably the most disturbing thing i've ever seen, and for a long time i had nightmares about it. Eventually my brain just blocked it out. Like i used to never remember my dreams, but i'd wake up screaming.
Now it's getting abit better, i remember my dreams sometimes, but not alot. But i've got prettty bad insomnia, i think it's from the night terrors.

Anyways, you are always going to miss your dad. and you probably know that, you just have to concentrate on the good. Why you liked him, the stuff he did, etc. And if you keep reminding yourself he's watching out for you, and he's in a better place it get's easier. Everything happens for a reason, and life has tests. This is just life testing you, and once you get through it you will be a stronger person. And everyday will get easier. You just have to accept that whats done is done, and concentrate on the good in life

Wow.
I am really sorry that happened to both of you.
My dad is still alive, and I am very grateful for that, but I am sorry I don't know how you honestly feel.

yes, im deeply sorry for your loss.
My dad is also still alive, so I cannot feel your pain. I see that you are still going on with your life which makes you a VERY strong person. I would lose it if I found my dad that way. I couldn't even fathom what you've been going through. The only advice I can give is to keep going. He is looking down upon you smiling and happy because you are still going strong. Remember only happy memories, and the negative ones will be lost.

So sorry to hear about this. I am sure it's been a very very hard thing for you. I'd also say it's better to think about the good days you had with your dad and enjoy those nice memories. Sometimes it's also a good idea to seek specialized help. Are you seeing any therapist? They do some good stuff too, it would surely help you a lot.