it is, isn't it?

:]

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Heres one a guy has actually said/wrote to me, it was kinda creepy and when all my friends read it they said it made me look like a hooker, but it was freakin hilarious

So I had a dream about you last night and we were at the movies and we just started making out, I couldnt help it I swear! So...You wanna go to the movie this weekend? I have some money

The whole time I read that I was like, I feel like a freakin prostatute!(sp?)

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And he did a terrible job at pick up..
Njord has many slick, under the radar pick ups. One I did the other day was pretty genius in my opinion (since i did get a number and a kiss)
------------------------ Personal Njord Story ~ The Cologne

Njord was out one day with a comrade, Tyr (I would've taken Thor but he's always breaking shit and hitting people with his hammer, Tyr is not as volitle), and needed a few things for the fall. Namely, shoes and accessories. So, we stop by a cologne shop and I - with the clerk's help - pick out a few to try. So, after long debating with myself, the clerk, and the sword brandishing Tyr, I finally settled on two I wanted to try. So, I put each on the back of my hand. Tyr also suggested I put some on my neck, but I was reluctant. I didn't want to go around smelling like two shits rubbed together. He forced me to put on one anyways..I can't fight him. He's the god of combat.

Njord then had to go buy some shoes, for his armored boots were not welcome in Valhalla High. Unfortunately, the Shoe Store did not have the Pf Flyers (number 5) that I wanted, which just goes to show that they shouldnt be called the fucking Shoe Store. However, the show store did have some wonderful ladies (one blonde/blue, the other an olive tanned black/green eyed bombshell *target*) , so Njord did what he does best. Tyr had no problem going up and hitting on the blond with no restraint, so I went ahead.

Without hesitation, I walked up to Olive, lightly grabbed her hand and said,
"Excuse me, I only need a minute of your time, but I have a problem."
"Yeah, what's up?" She had a killer smile and a sweet, innocent look on her face. She was maybe 20, but passed for 17 and she just radiated fun. Not to mention, a vague European accent. I couldn't help myself, I was hooked.
"Okay umm..hmm how shall I put this...Here how about you sit for me." With a devious smile on my face.
"Hmm..okay" she gave me a quizzical, and probably 'You're not going to get me', look on her face.
"Alright, let's say it's the middleages and you happen to be walking through a forest. It's fall, the leaves are golden brown and crunching underneath your feet. The cool air is blowing through your hair and the sun is lightly warming your skin. However, you're blind so you can only use your other senses, like touch and smell, to guide you through."
She laughs and says, "Okay I'm game."
"Well close your eyes then, you're totally not playing right, dork."
"Haha, dork?? Okay sure" and she closes her eyes...Man.....wow...okay umm..so!
"Alright, so you're walking through, but a tree root is raised above the ground, and you just miss it with your walking stick and take a tumble."
"Aww..poor me.." With a cute frown, MY GOD she was great.
Alright, so two men - pass by on their horses, and of course they stop to help."
"Are they sexy?" she asks..
"You're blind so no dice. But they do say they are knights"
"Aww.." pouts again, she is killing me here.
"Alright, so each offers you their hand, but of course, you don't trust everyone that easily. Since you're blind, you have to use your other senses to guide your emotions. You ask to feel their hands before you allow them to help you.." Which I give her my hands.."But they both feel the same, so there's no dice there."
"Hmm..yeah okay.." She's getting into it now, her imagination is roaring behind closed eyes.
"So you decide to use smell. You lightly take in both of their scents, and from there, you give your hand to the one who works the best."
"Okay so..."
"So..which guy do you give your hand to?" and she guides my hands closer and smells the colognes.
"Definitely the guy on the right." Hmm good call, I liked that too. However, I wasn't done yet, and apparently neither was she because her eyes were still closed.
"So he helps you up.." and I help her stand, with her hand still in mine.
"and he draws you close to make sure you're okay." I pulled her into me and put my arm around her back.
"mhm..." she knows it's over now
"And you happen to catch another whiff on his neck." Good call Tyr!
"He says, 'Mam are you okay?' and of course you say..?"
"What?" apparently she was tranced...bah..
"Oh my god, you're terrible at this..okay well thanks anyways." While I lightly push her off of me.
"No wait, I didnt catch the one on your neck." I almost lost it here, like seriously. It's hard when you make a woman push herself on you, and then when she finally does it, you want to yell and throw parties.
"Hmm..okay then..so where were we?"
"You were asking me if i was okay.."
"Aha..and were you?" so she smells the scent and of course, she melts into it.
"Yeah.." She's got her arm wrapped around my back/neck, so I just pull her closer.
"You know, the knight notices that you smell pretty good too.."
"Oh really?" Now she knows I'm hitting on her. Now a lot of guys fuck up here. Watch closely please.
"Yeah..kind of like...toothpaste." Boom. You figure out what I did. I'll give you a cookie if you do.
"Haha, funny." Very sexy, and I'm still holding on. My mind is reeling now.
"But I like toothpaste." and I lightly kiss her neck, while pressing her back on the racks of shoes.
She breathes hard and says, "I dont even know your name.."
I just say, "mmhmm" and continue with her neck, before brushing my lips across hers. Not a kiss, I just let her ache for what she thought she was getting. I then let her go and said, "You're right! I barely know you..You're trying to seduce me." With a playful look.
She says, "Haha..yeah.."Before coming back in and saying, "My name is Christina by the way."

Long story after that short, Christina ended up helping me buy shoes, a shirt, and the cologne before then going to hang out at the arcade (which she beat me at DDR like..10 times..fucking hustler). After which she couldnt come with me, but gave me her number and a nice kiss as an apology.

This weekend will be a blessing from god.

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http://p2valhalla.wordpress.com/
Earn the right to enter Valhalla by killing your social ineptitude in glorious fashion.

"excue me, I seem to have lost my number...may I have yours?"

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How much?

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oh wow.

way to be.

That made me laugh :]

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